I discovered a weakness of mine, with thanks to Project Avalon

[Church]

I allowed myself to be sucked into a vortex of negative energy recently, and I have no one to blame but myself. As a result of this, I stumbled upon something I needed to stumble upon: the fact that I am still angered by hatred. No matter what it is, when I witness or otherwise experience any forms of hate, it causes me to break off into polarity consciousness and hate hatred. The experience I encountered here had to do specifically with hatred of homosexuality, but it's all the same. I'm just tired of allowing myself to fall into anger when I can't control who hates whom and how they are going to manifest that hatred.

I now know that I must heal that portion of myself, and that hating hatred is obviously counter-productive. I want to say I am sorry to anyone who agreed with my sentiments in that thread, because I was angry with the bigotry that certain individuals were voicing, and my sentiments were tainted by the anger. I now know that I can't necessarily expect everyone I open up to, especially people reading threads I've posted in, to be of service-to-others, and to already be in a place of understanding that we are all One, no ifs ands or buts. There are many people left who still haven't figured that out yet, and I choose to Love those people as of right now. I Love All.

But I may very well not respond to certain posts or certain individuals, and I want to come right out and state that now, in print, before I hang around PA any further. I personally believe everything is already, and always has been, alright. Everything is going to be fine. But that doesn't change the fact that many people are going to be fearful of things they will be witnessing or experiencing in the upcoming years, and I only want to be there for those people. Anyone who wishes to participate in 3rd density dramas like Left vs Right, Conservative vs Republican, Christians vs Satanists, then be my guest... I just won't be paying much attention to you.

I guess this is sort of an introduction too. Certain ones of you are going to be seeing me more often, and as my higher self is convincing me I'm here to stay, the least I can do in my "rebellion" is type up this one last rant, which also serves as a disclaimer stating that I mean well, I love everyone (no one excluded), and I think many of you need to lighten up, and just start loving Life.

Anyway, I am a guy who was born and raised in Florida, by loving parents who fell in line and submitted to all forms of authority instituted in our society. We went to Catholic church. My parents voted in every election, local and beyond. They did what they were taught to do to raise children and be good people. I then got older and began having experiences, many of which took place under the context of catholicism, believe it or not!, which ultimately led to my waking up and realizing I was much larger then anything we have ever been taught to be. And my life hasn't been the same ever since.

A few of these things, quickly:

• At 6 years old I had an experience of being abducted or visited while my family vacationed in a small cottage in the mountains of north carolina. It happened every night, while I was supposed to be sleeping, but I felt wide awake. There was a being that my 6 year old brain categorized as a "bee man" and there was a lot of buzzing going on by his followers, but he was standing over me doing things which I don't remember. Then on the day that my parents were driving us off the property to return home, the bee man was standing on the side of the road and waved to me as we passed.
  
• My first account of anything I thought of as being "paranormal" was actually during a Catholic mass, some time back in the mid 80s, when the catholic clergy were preaching to us about visitations of the Virgin Mary in Medjugorje. One of the parishioners had been there, and had VHS footage of the sun falling towards Earth then rising again, and repeating this, while light shows were being displayed, and all the while the contactees were in a trance.
  
• I had lots of mystical and paranormal experiences on LSD which helped me to experience once and for all how my reality is the product of my mind, and once I stopped taking psychedelics I was still able to use the "powers" that they taught me.
  
• You know how hindsight is always 20/20? I now look back on a multitude of experiences, far beyond words, at least at the moment, and I can see that I have been witnessing UFOs in the sky my whole life, and it's because they are watching me. I don't know why, but they are.
  
• I seem to have eliminated most forms of fear from my life, but I make no claims about being superhuman or anything absurd like that. I am simply stating, and I believe it is the direct result of my psychedelic research, and having come close to death in a carjacking when I was 19, which turned out to be one of the most inspiring existential moments of my life actually, that I look around me at things my Brothers and Sisters across the planet are afraid of, and I am not. (As I alluded to in the beginning of this post, if anything I get angry, not scared. I'm healing that now.)
  
• I am here because the time is much nearer than most people here realize, where we will be forced to choose a path, and my higher self seems to think that my actions and/or vocalized thoughts help people to make their decision. I don't even know what that means, and I certainly don't own that, as a power or anything. It's just God using me for however God sees fit to do so.

I think this post is long enough. I just wanted to say that I love everyone, including the people I said mean things to (deserved or not) in that gay-bashing thread. I also wanted to say you'll never see or hear me engage in a conversation like THAT again! And now that that's past us, and I've been shown a part of myself I need to heal, I can get back to work. Thank you, Project Avalon for providing me with a scenario that caused me to see that I still had some anger in me I needed to process.

Dear God, help me to keep evolving and to stay on the path of Love. Help me to dissolve all the illusions I have about there still being people or things to hate out there in the world. Help me to understand that once I heal the broken parts of myself, I will no longer see people hating anyone out there, because I will have made peace within. Help me to demonstrate that there is never any need for anyone to have fear, for my own sake and for the sake of all my Brothers and Sisters. Thank you.