[Harper]

Hello Humble

I hear you loud and clear and for me there is a huge difference in understanding a concept intellectually and actually feeling it. Its the hardest task you have set yourself.

There are lots of people here whose interests lie in "the facts" of this or that and that is a very worthy occupation but totally secondary to what you have brought up in this thread.

It is so difficult to accept the love of others if you are like me and do not have a solid history of love to look to. What I mean is love and compassion pours out of me to the homeless animals my friends etc..... and I know intellectually that by analysing the actions of others towards me that they are expressions of love, but to trully feel it and accept it is a long road. Give yourself a break and realise that if you don't get it straightaway don't loose heart. As I said you are bringing forth the hardest of the lessons and perhps the most important one for us on the planet and you are only 27 so you have all the time in the world, despite what others may think on this forum.

I use a little thought that helps me. I imagine if I met me, how wonderful I would think I am and how nice I would be to someone like me. It actually makes you understand that you can love yourself by proxy, first, and then it will get easier and easier. Their is a division in you, and in all, a seperation of the heart and mind and to narrow that gap by the end of your life is a wonderful achievement indeed.

Allow yourself the space to love the other in you who feels unloved !

Take care

g