Well done for this thread Kulapops,
Lots of resonance with you here.
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This is my fear response. And while I feel this fear, I am all ears. I will pay attention to every little detail that is given me. Because every knowledge that I can get may help my very survival.
There is so much going on in the world that I cannot possibly know all the ins and out of the plans afoot that WILL affect my life, yet my mind wants to know as much as possible. It thinks it is up to the task of gathering and knowing up to a point at which it will become safe. Duh !
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O brother.... have i ever been going down that road.
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I am part of a cosmic machine...entity, call it what you will. I am a cell, a unit, a piecepart. Fashioned to do a task. A task that only I can complete. That task is surely not the knowing of everything. But of being. Being me. To the best of my ability. In being me, I will fulfil the task that only I can fulfil and after it's fulfilment, I will pass. As surely as a dandelion clock in the wind.
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Thanks for reminding me of what I keep forgetting in my states of uncentred anxieties.
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Love is not just some hippy claptrap, but , for me , it is a connection to the universal consciousness. Fear is protection of the self. Of course, protection of self is a necessary part of our life. But with talk of cataclysm, it is easy to go down the route of defining imagined dangers and forgetting the 'being' with love.
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Man do I ever need constant reminders.
I keep forgetting that the only times that I have felt real to myself ARE WHEN I HAVE FELT CONNECTED TO TO EVERYTHING AND FELT THE LOVE PERMEATE ME AND EVERYTHING AROUND ME.
I live because of these moments, and knowing that I have experienced these moments (however brief they be some times) I move forward in life with hope that I may experience them some more.
Strand