[Accipiter_Phi]

This forum, in a cumulative sense, is not for me.

I am leaving, I am tired... Its 2 in the morning and I want to say my last word... for tomorrow I will be in the ocean in the morning, and be counseling addicts in the night... Avalon will be a distant memory...

Please excuse the personal and tedious nature of this post.

"There is more to heaven and earth, Horatio, than is dreamt of in your philosophies." -W.S.

This earth, filled with infinite potential for bio-diversity, which originates from many, many exo civilizations, is being monitored very closely from many beings... and from many levels.

From aliens to angels, didactic despots to demons... the good, the bad, and the indifferent.

Why?

This time we are living in is a culmination of millions of years of development. What happens here will ripple throughout our galaxy and our hyper dimensional universe.

This is a strange time where the few have ruled the many... self described wolves herding sheep. The wolves have many vile technologies that can destroy not only our species, but ALL SPECIES... at the touch of a button.

Well, the universe works in unknowable and mysterious ways.

No matter how much power "illuminati" men claim to have, they are but paper tigers when compared to the big picture.

Well What IS the big picture? Thats up to one's own instinct to divine. Does one learn from the seemingly random traumas that occur in one's life? Are these occurrances truly random? Or, are traumas merely catalysts of experience, potentials for learning and for growth? Does one often wonder: "Why me?" OR, does one view life as an interconnected and unfathomably intricate classroom designed for the purpose finding and redefining "knowledge of self."

Personally, I've beat my head against the wall for much of my life... miserable and in victim consciousness. I finally started to realize that the coincidences occurring in my life HAD to be connected to something bigger... Simply put, I KNEW this couldn't be "IT."

I was raised by two doctors; empiracally minded with leanings towards ATHEISM. I shrouded myself in Academia and cut myself off to all of creation that was not in a refereed academic journal.

I was almost killed from a trauma incident, and had 11 bypass surgeries (all of them failed under "strange" circumstances), over the course of 10 years. I plunged to depths of depression, drugs, debauchery and self loathing. I was in "poor me, WHY me?" mode. I didn't understand that the surgeries failed for a reason. I was told I would lose my leg and, at best, never walk again without a pronounced limp. (Long story short, later, I eventually regrew my circulation through visualization and believing I could.) I intrinsically "knew" something was very wrong with this planet at this time... it just seemed so , incomplete.

Then, I saw my first ufo in 1994 as I stood on the rubble of Northridge... moments after being in the epicenter of a 6.7 earthquake.

I saw my second the next night, in the hills of Malibu by my parents home.

This marked the beginning of my seeking answers experientially, not academic regurgitation.

I began to actively seek answers... and to embrace the natural empathy I felt for others at the expense of losing some childhood Hollywood friends and lifestyle. I didn't want to hurt people anymore with my words or actions or relationships. What I found was growth. A new paradigm where possibilities are infinite.

On one hand, My reality exploded with potential, cognitive abilities, and love. On the other hand, I felt distraught that there was literally no way for me to express what I have experienced in order to help others that were stuck where I was beforehand. Words are inadequate. Experiences are only mindblowing to the experiencer.

When communicating to a being about this very quandary, they replied "Life is an adventure...it is different for everyone... life is like [travel on your freeways (image, not words, shown)]...[like your freeways,] which exit will you choose?.. You have chose a path to show others, YET, a path for NO OTHERS." (the quote loses some of its finesse when translated to static words).

Back to the "big picture:"

Much previously hidden information wil be known. This is mandated.

The people of the world are to choose their own fate... the fate of their species and the fate of the sentient planet in which they dwell.

Whether they choose life or death, freedom or enslavement, love or hate, is up to the individual. These decisions lie in the seemingly mundane; how you treat your neighbor, your kids, strangers, your "enemies."

The game has been the same since the beginning of space/time:
FREEWILL... many beings are present to assure that the populace has this choice rather than being enslaved or blown up on a whim.

If one thinks that physical survival is the only endgame, then you have already failed.

For the last 14 years, I have seen and experienced phenomena that most of this forum would not believe.

By the time I turned 33 last month, I was given back memories from places and spaces that are not of the last 33 years. I was given a grand perspective... a cumulative review of my experiences here; Remembrance of WHY I came.

It was not to prove anything to anybody.

It was simply to live within harmony of the Logos... to emanate the very frequency that lent itself to the creation of all that is.

This forum is not conducive to my agreed upon intentions. There is too much fear... Fear of not only losing physical survival, BUT fear of living their own lives as conscious Co-Creators. One can run and hide in fear, or one can stand and live their truth with faith that they will attract what they need when they need it. To learn to Be here now. To learn for oneself through doing. Not simply waiting to be told, to be saved by another.

SAVIOR-SELF.