Tuza;
30 yrs huh? I am 23 years married to Mrs Doesn't Get IT - the bookeepper.
Ours is a symbiotic relationship. I pretened keeping the bills paid is important, she pretends not to mind all the nutty tuff I carry around in my brain; that it isn't half as scary as it sounds.
What I don't do is force any of it on her "just for effect". That kind of confrontation just never leads anywhere usefull anyway.
Now, she deals in things financial all day for a living, so I did pick up some credibility by telling her several weeks beforehand to move our accounts before our bank went under. She did. It did. It also told me that part of her resistance is plain ol' denial. She knows things are coming apart, she just doesn't like it.
Besides, the notion you're going to "grab someone by the ears, and acquaint them with reality" does seem kind of silly. i mean what is it you're selling, but one snapshot of an ever-changing total picture, anyway?
Deep breatrhs, patience and trust.you know, the usual tricks
Fred