IRVING...hey i can completely relate. i'm a painter, moved to nyc to "make it" but feel very little motivation, when i look at the big picture. funny how i can't seem to meet people in person who resonnate the same. yes, mindless conversation just bores me and i used to socialize and go out a lot, but now all i want to do, is learn about other worlds and spend a lot of time reading info on the web.
i was sick a while back and can recommend a medical intuitive. she's really incredible. i know this sounds out there but she will muscle test you over the phone and your body will tell her what is wrong. based on that she puts you on a diet w homeopathic and supplements. she "cured" me when i had given up hope going to western doctors. and she's not expensive. Her name is Dr. Denice Moffat and she has a very informative website:
www.naturalhealthtechniques.com. all of her contact info is there. good luck and keep your chin up!
you might also read, Louis Haye's book called You Can Heal your life. much about emotional spiritual root cause of illness.