[Olam]

Its really great that you made the connection. Now on to another hurdle.......please stop affirming that you are an idiot!...you are not.
The more you say this, especially writing it down, the more you hurt yourself. The power of thought is just that, very powerful. To cancel out what you just did, reaffirm and not only write down that you are not an idiot, but that you are a divine being with creational powers. If you were not, you could not of made this very powerful connection to source.
Namaste