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Luminari · 05-07-2009, 02:33 PM

# In an average living room there are 1,242 objects Chuck Norris could use to kill you, including the room itself.

# There is no theory of evolution. Just a list of animals Chuck Norris allows to live.

# Chuck Norris is not hung like a horse... horses are hung like Chuck Norris.

# Chuck Norris can hit you so hard that he can actually alter your DNA. Decades from now your descendants will occasionally clutch their heads and yell "What The Hell was That?"

# Chuck Norris discovered a new theory of relativity involving multiple universes in which Chuck Norris is even more badass than in this one. When it was discovered by Albert Einstein and made public, Chuck Norris roundhouse-kicked him in the face. We know Albert Einstein today as Stephen Hawking.

# Chuck Norris sheds his skin twice a year.

05-07-2009, 02:33 PM	#288
Luminari Avalon Senior Member Join Date: Sep 2008 Location: Australia Posts: 2,570	Re: Quotes and jokes! # In an average living room there are 1,242 objects Chuck Norris could use to kill you, including the room itself. # There is no theory of evolution. Just a list of animals Chuck Norris allows to live. # Chuck Norris is not hung like a horse... horses are hung like Chuck Norris. # Chuck Norris can hit you so hard that he can actually alter your DNA. Decades from now your descendants will occasionally clutch their heads and yell "What The Hell was That?" # Chuck Norris discovered a new theory of relativity involving multiple universes in which Chuck Norris is even more badass than in this one. When it was discovered by Albert Einstein and made public, Chuck Norris roundhouse-kicked him in the face. We know Albert Einstein today as Stephen Hawking. # Chuck Norris sheds his skin twice a year.